As a parent, you have an opportunity to be a very strong positive influence that will last throughout your child’s lifetime.  You can give your son or daughter the connection with a loving adult that he or she needs to become a strong and successful person.  The strengths or assets that all young people need can be grouped into eight categories:

1. Support – Parents who show that they love their children and will stand by them, no mater what.
2. Empowerment – Parents who make it clear that children are valued for who they are.
3. Boundaries and Expectations – Parents who have high yet realistic expectations for their children, and who set and uphold clear limits for their behavior.
4. Constructive Use of Time – Parents who help their children balance school, activities, time with friends, and time at home.
5. Commitment to Learning – Parents who encourage and model a love of learning.
6. Positive Values – Parents who talk about and model basic values such as honesty, trust and responsibility.
7. Social Competencies – Parents who instill in their children an interest in and comfort with other people, and help them develop strong skills to relate respectfully to everyone.
8. Positive Identity – Parents who nurture their children’s self-esteem, feeling of control over their own lives, and sense of hope.

Young people who have more of these strengths are much more likely to be academically successful and free of alcohol, tobacco and drug use problems.

What are some of the specific practical ways you can give your children and teens what they need to succeed every day?  Here’s a checklist to start with:

TODAY I WILL…
 Ask my child how he or she is doing
 Really listen to my child
 Set an example of responsibility and respect for others
 Be honest with my spouse, kids, friends, neighbors – even salespeople
 Offer my child opportunities to contribute to the family and others in meaningful ways
 Notice what is happening in our neighborhood
 Ask my child what they learned, liked and didn’t like in school
 Keep track of what my child is doing and where they are
 Provide a quiet place for homework
 Know when to turn off the TV
 Tell my child one thing I love or appreciate about her or him

Check out www.search-institute.org for more ideas about how to give your child what they need to succeed.